Ask Amy: Pick up your family from the airport instead of sending them by car

Ask Amy: Pick up your family from the airport instead of sending them by car

Ask Amy: Pick up your family from the airport instead of sending them by car

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dear Amy: My nephew recently reported that no, he will not be picking up his 77-year-old mother from the airport. “Besides,” he said, “it’s easier to take a cab, Uber, or Lyft.”

To this remark, I answer: “Easier for whom?

Visiting loved ones means packing, packing, going through security, and possible crowds and delays – not to mention the expense. So, is it a stretch to expect the person you’re visiting to travel to the airport to pick you up?

Let me put it like this. After an arduous journey, seeing a familiar, loving face and then receiving a big hug means your journey is over. Phew! Riding in the nicest rental car means you’re always traveling – sitting in the back of a car, alone, on one more leg of your journey.

Nowadays, it is common to outsource everything. Let’s not outsource love and compassion.

Aunt: Picking someone up (or taking them) from the airport is such a sign of intimacy that it has entered popular culture. From “When Harry Met Sally” to “Seinfeld,” transporting someone to or from the airport shows you care. A lot.

I remember those wonderful opening and closing scenes from the movie “Love Actually,” consisting of a long montage of people greeting each other in an airport terminal and – clutching their hearts.

When I travel, I arrive and depart from an airport serving a nearby military base (hello, 10th Mountain Division!). Want a scene that will stop you in your tracks? Watch a soldier return home after a deployment.

I publish your thoughtful letter as a public service to distant families around the world. Guy. Find your mom at the airport! It is a beautiful act of love.

dear Amy: I have been dating a woman for almost six years now. The problem is that she calls her husband several times a day. They are separated, but not divorced. She says it’s about the children (who are all adults).

She told a few people in her family that we were together, but she refuses to tell her husband because she still has things at home and she is afraid that he will break her things or don’t leave him his things.

They had been together for about 20 years. We live together, but she tells everyone we’re roommates. Am I wasting my time or what?

I love her and I think she loves me. I just think she’s afraid of change and keeping him updated in case we break up. What do you think I should do?

Concerned: Suppose you are right about everything you say: your partner is still attached to her husband, is afraid of change, lies about your relationship and embarrasses her husband. Given that all of this is true, after six years, is that what you want?

You are in a relationship with a married person and you will probably stay married. She doesn’t want to be in an honest and open relationship with you.

Imagine if a friend of yours described her own relationship this way: “She is married and continues to be closely linked to her husband. She and I live together, but we are discreet, so we have to keep it a secret.

Would you describe this as a healthy way to live? Would you like your friend to be in a relationship that seems to have no future? I doubt.

So yes, you are wasting your time. It’s time for you to be your own best friend and move forward with the authentic life you want to lead.

dear Amy: “happy bachelorand many other people wonder how to answer intrusive personal questions. What usually works for me is a friendly, straightforward smile accompanied by a change of subject and a non-intrusive question on my part.

For example, “Yeah, that rain. I practically had to swim here. When is it supposed to stop? »

Snoopers get the message, no one’s feelings are hurt, everyone saves face and the conversation moves on.

I have arrived:While I suggested a technique of reframing the original question and throwing it back to the person who asked it, I very much appreciate your suggestion, which is a version of “Wow, what about the Cubs this year? I see they finally got a shortstop; do you think they’ll turn it around next season?

©2022 by Amy Dickinson distributed by Tribune Content Agency

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